The most depressing year of your life.

So I may or may not have found an "in between" job. At this point I have been applying for jobs that are not ones that I really really want to do but ones that I could stand doing in order to get my mother off my back!! She seems to think that if she mentions me getting a job enough in everyday conversation it doesn't count as hounding me about it and therefore she isn't being freaking annoying. Sorry mom, that is false. Hounding me in everyday conversation is still hounding. Even if you don't just up and say "get a job!" every time I walk in a room, when every time I say something even remotely close to "man, I need to get some of "insert item a here(usually something necessary like shampoo or like, lotion for my face)" she says, "Well, get a job so you can buy it yourself." which, granted is a valid opinion since I am a college graduate and I should have a job, but apparently the fact that I spend at least 50% of my time looking for jobs is irrelevant. I just want to yell "I AM TRYING TO GET A JOB! DON'T YOU THINK I WANT TO GET OUT OF THIS HOUSE WORSE THAN YOU WANT ME TO LEAVE!!????" I have spent the last four years of my life being relatively independent and having jobs that pay for my everyday expenses so why would I want to live at home and mooch off my parents if I could help it?

I am starting to realize in a very tangible way why they call the year after college the most depressing year of your life.

I think that my mother just doesn't think I am trying hard enough. I think she doesn't realize that I am trying to find a job in which I make enough money that I can actually make my loan payments. Enough money that I will be able to pay them off sometime within the next century so that I can get on with what I really want to do, which is be poor and live abroad and do development at a grassroots level. I don't really know exactly what it is that I want to do yet, I don't know if I want to work in water purification or sustainable agriculture, or education, or HIV/AIDS awareness or any number of other things that I could do, but I know that I want do something abroad and I also know that I have to get some hands on in the field experience before I can come back and go to grad school and really decide what it is that I want to focus on and then maybe actually be the change I want to see in the world. (thanks Mahatma Gandhi)

Life is relatively good all things considered, though. I am sitting in a coffee shop, drinking a pumpkin spice latte supplied by a buy one get one free coupon from my generous sister who has helped to support her derelict older sister for the past few months and I am still healthy and able to do things that I really want to do, albeit with a lot more begging and forced labor than was necessary before.